As I sit here staring out my window, which is my own unique monitor to the world....I sift through the rayless shadows of my mind for a splinter of light to illuminate the deep depression that I wear like an insane overcoat.

Another year has come and gone....and certain questions enter my mind, like:
Have I truly evolved as an individual or have I just taken another measured step towards the final resting place that we all must encounter.

In my mind I truly know the definition between glorious progress and plain old existing...it is as easy as the difference between leaving a positive legacy and a slow march into oblivion.

As I sit here, like some mad conjurer tossing these thoughts around in my head...my gaze centers upon an old wino directing traffic in the street.  He waves his arms like some out-of-control windmill smiling, as he goes about his work.  I laugh.  "Some things never change", I think to myself.

I look and see children playing in the street, throwing snowballs and chasing each other.... all in the spirit of fun..... And I remember how much I used to enjoy doing that.

The #1 bus pulls up to the curb and as one man exits the bus, he sees an old
friend about to board the bus.  "What's up man! I haven't saw you in awhile.", he says.  They hug and exchange phone numbers.  "Now, don't be a stranger....ya' hear?".  They smile and wave to each other as the bus pulls away from the curb.   "That's nice.", I say.

A little old lady walks slowly down the avenue carrying grocery bags that I know are full of all the things that she will cook for this holiday season.  And even though I don't partake in holidays myself, I can almost smell the cakes and pies that I know she will create.  "Boy, blak women sure can cook", I say to no one in general.

At that very moment, the wino stops directing traffic and walks over to assist the old lady with her bags.  "Thank you sir", she says as she hands him a few bags, "I'll give you a little something for helping me.  I could barely make it."  The wino smiles broadly and says, "That's all right.  We all could use a little help every now and then.  Don't worry about it."  Then like two comrades-in-arms they make their way towards the direction of where the little old lady stays.

The dark clouds of depression start to clear and the drab feelings of gloom fade as positive thoughts start to invade my mind.  I jump up and grab my coat to go out into the world.  A world I know I must conquer to be a success in this life.  But now I welcome the challenge and am ready for battle.  Because life is for the living and not a journey into death.  And I give thanks unto the Creator for this day and the ones that are to follow.

P.S. Let's make this a new beginning at the dawn of the new millennium and not just another exercise of "same ol', same ol'".  And to the youth: let's not make this a another tragic Y2K.... Y2K = Youth 2 kill.