First, I wish to address the way we dress. I recently had a 20-something Brother ask "Why do women wear outrageous clothes?" I didn't have the time to answer that particular Brother, but I have answered many other Brothers who have asked the same question, and my answer is and has been "Because Men seem to like it. When enough Men start telling Women to stop dressing this way and mean it, they will stop!"
I advise Brothers to speak up when the Sisters they are dealing with, dress in a way they do not like. However, I recommend they do so in a kind, gentle and respectful way. No Woman wants a Man to tell her how she should dress, it can be considered an insult. But it is an area we should address. In my opinion, we show far too much skin. If we dress in a respectful manner, we are in better positions to be treated respectfully.
Sisters, we need to address how we are raising our children. Some of our children have no idea who or what GOD/JAH/ALLAH is. Some of them, have no idea what's it's like to go to church as a family. Some have no idea what it's like to have peace or unity within the family. Some have never had both parents living in the same home. By the looks of some of the children I see, I would say some have no one to love them - and I find that completely unacceptable, and if I do, how does GOD/JAH/ALLAH see it?
Sisters, another aspect we should look at is our public behavior. People see us all over our communities, at work, at the store, in the park, etc. My Mother once told me to "Act in public, as I would if she was always with me. You never know who knows me and you, that you do not know." I never forgot that warning. Always carry yourself in a respectful manner. Always treat people with grace, respect and dignity. If you do so, people will remember it, and treat you the same.
This
point is the hardest one of all. I know I'm going to hear from some
of you on this one, but I must, it needs to be said once and for all!
Get a job, an additional job, a better paying job, or start you own business! Please stop begging! To depend on another is to admit you are a child and are not able to care for yourself. If that is the case, you are not perceived as a Woman but a child! If you and a Brother are sharing a home, it is the responsibility of both of you to share in the expenses of the home. If you both are not doing so, you have a duty to ask yourself a few hard questions, and face the hard answers. If you are begging on your job, stop. If your supervisor is going to give you a raise, he/she will because your work deserves it. If he/she has no intention of giving you a raise, your begging makes you seem foolish. Never debase yourself!
My last point is this, Sisters, we must re-evaluate how we treat each other. That was one of the points of The Million Woman March, and it is very true. We have a nasty habit of belittling each other and doing all manner of disrespectful things to each other. How we treat each other dictates how we are treated. Let's stop the gossip, backbiting, lies, slander, fights over Men, and other incorrect actions against each other. No Woman is an island, we need each other.
In
this crazy world we live in, we need each others shoulder to lean or cry
on. We need each other's strengths, we need each other's wisdom and
compassion. We need each other's knowledge and experience.
Tyree